Dreams of the Lost Ones
by Sanglante Melodie
Summary: They kept wishing and hoping...but always passing each other by inches. A collection of works for Totenveloren1's writing contest on Kofk. SLASH
1. For Eternity

**A/N:** A medium length poem from Regulus to Severus. For anyone who haven't guessed it yet...this is SLASH. So no like no read.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything.

* * *

**For Eternity**

Should my sight holds nothing but the darkness of the abyss,

I still shall see thee.

Thy eyes shining like twin pools of obsidian,

Thy skin pale and thy hair of silk,

Thou move with cloak outstretched like wings.

I shall hold thy image in my sight for eternity.

Should my ears hear nothing but silence of the void,

I still shall hear thee.

Thy voice of magic and promises, of steel and conviction,

Thy voice whispering secrets and love,

Thou tell me no lies of the past or the future.

I shall feel the caresses of thy words by my ears for eternity.

Should my lips be sewn into eternal silence,

I still shall chant thy name.

Thy name of Prince, of old blood and times,

Thy name of snake, spy, and potion master,

Thou never lost sight of thy identity.

I shall form thy name of my lips for eternity.

Should my limbs be broken to endless pieces,

I still shall hold thee.

Thy thin frame battered by too many deaths,

Thy hands splattered with blood,

Thou seek to survive in this time of chaos.

I shall embrace thee with my phantom limbs for eternity.

Should my body turns to ashes scattered by the wind,

I still shall find thee.

Thy facade of cruelty and disdain,

Thy heart of contradictions and vulnerabilities,

Thou art not what thy image showed.

I shall walk beside thee in my lost body for eternity.

Should my heart become cold and unmoving,

I still shall sense thee.

Thy scent of dungeons, herbs, and potions,

Thy scent of iron and long gone dreams,

Thou capture me with your existence.

I shall…imprint thy presence in my blood for eternity.

I shall blind thy eyes 'til thou see nothing but me.

I shall shield thy ears 'til thou hear only my words.

I shall cover thy lips 'til thou breath my name.

I shall bind thy limbs so thou cannot leave me.

I shall capture thy body so thou art mine.

I shall hold thy heart as long as thy blood flows.

I shall take thy heart, take thy soul,

Until all of thee is mine to own.

Until thou dream of me as I do thee…

For eternity.


	2. Black Storms

A child dressed in oversized and mismatched clothing gazed blankly into the night, as thunder rumbled in the distance and the lightning-laced clouds rolled leisurely in the sky. Severus Snape rested his head on the cold window glass and listened to the staccato rhythm of the rain.

He merged himself into that lawless tempo and tried to block out everything else. Try as he might, the sound of raised voices still reached him. He huddled in the window seat and tried to stay indifferent to his mother's pain. He ached to help her but he could not. He had tried before and his efforts only earned him a broken rib and numerous bruises. So his mother had told him to stay away and he reluctantly obeyed.

He never understood why his mother stayed with his father. She could have easily left him. After all, she was a witch. Magic ran in her veins.

Just as it did his.

Severus always took comfort in the fact that he was a wizard. As long as he had magic, he knew that someday he could get away. Someday, he could walk away and never look back. Sitting there, forgotten by the rest of the world, he knew loneliness. In this world, he was alone. His father always pretended that he didn't exist and his mother…barely remembered his name of most the time. Submerged in her self-pity, she moved around the house like a ghost. She had cared for him but now he doubt she cared who he was. He had vowed to never be the same as his mother. Eileen Prince had given up on life but Severus Snape never would.

But it was a lonely life he would live.

* * *

Hogwarts housed dreams of countless children…as well as gave life to endless disillusions. It was a rose colored mirror of the outside world that was nevertheless cruel. When ideals met reality, something had to give. No matter where humans were still humans.

Nevertheless, Hogwarts was magnificent in his magical glory.

In its vast library, a black-haired boy was pouring over several tomes of potion that were spread across the old wooden desk. The sound of a quill scratching against parchment could be heard as he diligently made notes. Severus Snape unconsciously worried his lip as he stumbled over some part that was difficult to understand. Minutes and hours fell away as he immersed himself in research.

"What's so interesting?" A voice asked from across from him.

Severus blinked, quill pausing from the frantic writing, and looked up from his parchment. Across the table, another blacked-haired Slytherin student sat with his arms folded on the table. Severus recognized him as Sirius Black's younger brother, Regulus Black.

He leveled a glare at the fourth year Slytherin. "None of your business." He snapped. Severus didn't want anything to do with someone who shared the same blood as Sirius Black. His hated enemy and tormentor. He looked back down to continue his work.

"Wait!"

Severus looked back up. "What?"

"Can you help me with potions? You are best at it." Regulus looked at him with pleading eyes. Severus wondered why the other Slytherin would bother. It was not like studying really meant anything to him. After all, he had the fortune of the Black House to fall back to. He would never need to work a day in his life.

"Please?"

"No." Severus said firmly. He would not put up with a spoiled pure-blood child.

"Pretty please?"

"I said no!"

"I will buy you whatever ingredient you want."

"N—What?" Severus stared at the other Slytherin, shocked.

"If you help me with potions I will buy whatever ingredient you want." The Black smiled, having caught Severus in his trap.

Severus thought over the offer and realized that he would only benefit from it. "Even Basilisk scales?"

Regulus nodded eagerly. "If that's what you want."

The older boy sighed. "Fine. Come back to the library at the same time tomorrow."

The youngest Black smiled. "Thank you!" With that he stood up before running off.

Severus only shook his head when turned his attention back his work. Back then, he didn't know that meeting would change the path of his life.

* * *

The sound of glass shattering echoed loudly in the unused classroom. Streams of light flashed across the room as Severus proceeded to demolish the room. Jars exploded into pieces _reflecting his heart_, furniture contouring into unnatural shapes _just like his thoughts_.

_She left him. He was all alone now._

_How could she? How could he?_

_It was all his fault. No one to blame but himself._

His anger had gotten better of him. One slip of word and everything fell apart. Even if he didn't mean it, it was already too late. He had ruined the only friendship he had. How many things ever lasted in his life? The first had being his mother. Personally, he thought that she died because she couldn't take it anymore. His father didn't last long either but he didn't care about him. Then there was Lily Evans who was driven away by his own pride.

Eventually, he stood dazed among the ruins of the room. His angerfeardeperation had run out, leaving him feeling empty. He didn't even notice the door of the classroom opening until a pair of arms encircled his body. He titled his head to see Regulus hugging him.

"What are you doing?" He asked the younger Slytherin incredulously. During his time tutoring Regulus, he had found that the Black was nothing like his brother. Regulus was quiet and thoughtful while Sirius was wild and brash. He was his older brother's polar opposite in everything except potion skills. Regulus, the older Slytherin had discovered, couldn't brew a potion to save his life. It wasn't that he didn't understand. He simply didn't have the intuition needed for potion.

"What do you think?" Regulus replied as he tightened his arms.

"I think you should keep your hands to yourself." Severus snapped. He was mortified that the other boy saw his display of weakness. If Regulus would just let go, he would go and hide where no one could find him.

"No. You will just run away." Regulus walked around Severus until they were facing each other. "Tell me, what made you so angry?"

Severus clenched his jaw. How could he tell anyone of his folly, of the consequences of his foolish pride?

Regulus steadily held Severus' reluctant gaze. "Do you think that I would laugh at you? If anyone should laugh, it's you! You have seen how I can botch even the simplest potion."

The older Slytherin wanted to turn away but the younger Black held him in place. Why not tell him. Let him judge. It really didn't matter anymore. He had already lost Lily.

So hesitantly he told Regulus what happened with Lily and the Marauders. His hands were curled into shaking fists when he neared the end of his tale.

"Go ahead and laugh! Tell me that I am foolish!" He nearly screamed at Regulus, desperation coloring his words. "I can't hold onto anything I have." He finished in a whisper.

He was surprised when long fingers ran gently through his hair. Regulus didn't say a word but to hold him closer.

"Everything will be fine." Regulus whispered into his ear. "Are you not alone. I am here." He continued to whisper promises as Severus gradually calmed in his hold. "I will always be here."

On his part, Severus found himself believing those words. He felt warm and safe in the embrace, wanting nothing more than staying there forever. But now that he was calm, he had no reason to stay. Reluctantly, he pulled away.

"Why are you doing this?" He asked, anticipating and dreading the answer.

Regulus smiled. "I like you."

Black eyes widened in shock. "What? You can't like me." How can someone like Regulus even say that? People like them rarely ever interact in their lives.

"I can and I do." Regulus answered easily. "Is it so hard to believe that you are attractive?"

"I…No, you just can't."

"Are you not going to give me a chance to prove myself to you?" Regulus insisted. Snape had long learned that Regulus was incredibly stubborn. Once he set his mind on something, he rarely changed it.

Severus had no words as he tried to sort through his feelings. What did he think of Regulus? A failure in potion. Stubborn, cheerful, persistent, cunning, perceptive, loveable…Severus stopped himself. He turned the word over in his head and realized that it was true. Somewhere along the way he had came to care for Regulus. He just never realized. The damned brat had wormed his way into his heart.

"…Then I will take your silence as acquiescence." Severus realized that Regulus had being speaking when he was lost in his thoughts. It took him another moment to register what the other Slytherin actually said. His lips reluctantly curled into a smile. Regulus was indeed a Slytherin. He slowly nodded.

Regulus let out a whoop and grinned. "Great!" He grabbed Severus' hand. "Let's go get something to eat." Then he paused to look around the trashed room. "Well, after we fix this." He amended.

* * *

The time Severus spent with Regulus was like a dream. They occasionally walked around the Black Lake, went to Homestead at Regulus' insistence, and went to places just to soak in each other's company. Most of the time, they curled up together on a couch and discuss everything that ranged from magic, potions, books, philosophy, buildings, and anything they could think of. Severus had found that Regulus was very attentive and somewhat of a romantic. The only good thing was that instead of flowers, Regulus would give Snape potion ingredients or other things Severus actually liked. Little by little, Severus began to forget what life was like before Regulus.

But no dream would last forever. When it did end, reality would come intruding like a bucket full of icy water. Severus was the first to graduate from Hogwarts, going on to pursue his dream of becoming a Potion Master. A year later, Regulus followed, not to pursue a profession but to follow the will of his parents.

They were divided by the expectations society. A divided that was invisible yet so far apart.

_The whispers of a war brewing. _

Severus ran a hand through the black curls of the younger boy lying on his lap. Regulus hummed as he enjoyed the attention.

"My parents want me to join the Death Eaters." Regulus said in a voice so soft that Severus almost missed his words.

The caressing hand stopped. "The Dark Lord?"

Regulus nodded.

"Are you going to?" Severus asked. He didn't know what to think of the news. He didn't particularly care about the Dark or the Light. He was practically dark but he was nothing like the pure-bloods that were rumored to follow the rising Dark Lord.

"I think so. Lots of pure-bloods are agreeing to his ideals." Regulus confessed. "But that aside, tell me about your latest potion experiment."

Severus smiled indulgently at Regulus' blatant effort to change topics. He decided to indulge Black. "Be careful, okay?"

Regulus smiled and promised.

Only, it was an empty promise. A year later, Regulus was dead, killed by the Dark Lord. And Severus would follow his path.

* * *

When Severus learned the new, he didn't cry. Didn't scream. Didn't break down. He just went on his business as normal. It was as if the new had nothing to do with him. He was simply numb. He was a stranger in his body, watching the world with a strange detachment. The calm lasted a week before the storm came.

Gone.

He laid waste to his lab—torn the shelves down along with their contents, threw priceless ingredients into a pile and burned them, shattered his cauldron with a spell. Then, when the hurricane of anger passed, he collapsed onto the floor in grief.

Dead. Gone forever.

He cried, pounded his fists against the floor until they were bloody. Cold permeated his body. He felt like he was the one who was dead instead of Regulus. Naive, sweet Regulus. What was a life without Regulus by his side?

Before he knew it, he was laughing. The sharp broken sound echoed in the room. He laughed even as tears continued to drip to the floor.

Fate had once again taken away something precious to him. Gritting his teeth, he dried his tears with his sleeve. But this time, it wouldn't do unpunished. No, he would bring down the Dark Lord. He would have his revenge.

Severus picked himself off the floor, eyes shining with new found determination. Vengeance would be his sole purpose until he could join Regulus again.

* * *

The venom burned through his veins, each heartbeat brought him close to death. He felt strangely calm in the face of his death. Perhaps he had always being anticipating it, waiting for the day he would be back in the arms of his lover. They had being apart long enough.

But he had one last part to play. The Potter child came with all his hatred and anger. With shaking hands, Severus retrieved his memories and gave it to the Boy-Who-Lived. There, it would direct him.

Snape tilted his head to look at the sky as his life faded away. He had only one thought before death claimed him.

_Regulus._


	3. The Promise

Regulus had always been the second best. He was the second son. He was the spared to his brother the heir. His brother was the pride of the family. His brother was the one destined to be the future head of the Ancient and Noble House of Black. For a long time, he was content to be second best, to be in his brother's shadows.

It all changed once he went to Hogwarts. All of a sudden, Sirius was no longer the prodigal son. He was a failure to their parents. What Black was sorted into Griffindor? None—until Sirius. But Sirius was Sirius. He paid no mind to his parent's expectations. Paid no mind the pure-blood traditions or cultures. He always rebelled against the wills of their parents. Regulus didn't know how many times he used a silence spell to preserve his hearing as his parents and sibling screamed at each other.

It was during Sirius' fifth year of school, Regulus' fourth year, when the Black Heir ran away from his house. All of a sudden, all the expectation that previously belonged to the heir was dropped into Regulus' lap. It caught him by surprised and most of all unprepared.

His parents demanded perfection out of everything—the grade, the behavior, the knowledge. Everything slammed into Regulus like a hurricane and he had no time to make heads or tails of it. When he thought he would drown under the weight of everything, he found Severus Snape.

It was by accident really. He had come to the library for some materials on his classes that he was falling behind when he saw Severus absorbed into a book. The older Slytherin wasn't doing anything but he simply gave off that air of authority. He held himself with confidence and grace. Severus was striking to say the least. One glance and Regulus was entranced.

Thus he began to follow (stalk) Severus around the school as well as getting all the information he could about the older boy. To his delight, he learned that Severus was a prodigy at potion. Fate must be look out for him. He now had an excuse to approach the aloof boy.

What a Black wanted, a Black get.

* * *

"Do you have no sense at all? I said to put a moderate amount of herbs. Not the whole bag!" Severus snarled. He pulled out his wand and vanished the ruined potion.

"I am sorry!" Regulus threw up his hands. "I am awful at potions." He hid a grin. He did enjoy baiting Severus at times. The other boy simply look magnificent when angered.

"It didn't mean you have to be dimwit." Severus snapped then sighed. "Potion is all precision and intuition." He glared at Regulus. "And you have neither of them."

"I can't help it." Regulus mumbled, looking sullen. He didn't want to admit that he was awful at something Severus was so obviously good at. How could he proud himself to the other Slytherin when he was always messing up?

"Why do you feel the need to learn something you have obviously no talent at anyways?" Snape asked after he cleaned up the mess Regulus made.

The youngest Black sighed. "Because I am the Heir of the Ancient and Noble House of Black." He didn't know where to begin explaining.

"Sirius didn't bother with this." Severus pointed out.

"And you know how he turned out."

Severus gave him a long look before turning away. "You don't have to be perfect." He said grudgingly.

"And you obviously never lived in my house. Some days, I envy Sirius for running away. At least he is free now." There, that was the truth. If there was one thing he admired about Sirius, it was that.

Severus fell silent but his gaze was heavy on Regulus. Black felt like he was being judged by that stare, being looked into his core.

"Maybe." Severus said eventually.

* * *

He didn't know why but he had the sudden urge to find Severus. Using a locating spell, he found Severus in an unused classroom. Opening the door, he was unprepared to see the mess that was the room. It looked like a tornado had swept through it. In the middle of it all stood Severus with his back to the door. He seemed totally obvious to the world.

Before he knew it, Regulus had already closed his arms around Severus. He sense that if he didn't hold the other boy there, Severus would fly away. There was a sadness—loneliness—about the older Slytherin.

"What are you doing?" He heard Severus ask in a strained tone.

"What do you think?" Regulus replied and tightened his arms so Severus could not get away.

"I think you should keep your hands to yourself." Severus snapped, angry.

"No. You will just run away." Regulus walked around Severus until they were facing each other. "Tell me, what made you so angry?"

When Severus didn't reply, Regulus looked their gaze together. If he had to force the confession out of the other boy then he would. He was a Slytherin after all. "Do you think that I would laugh at you? If anyone should laugh, it's you! You have seen how I can botch even the simplest potion."

Severus had tried to escape but Regulus persisted. And eventually got what he wanted. He listened intently to Severus' tale. He felt anger towards the Marauders and most importantly jealousy towards Lily. She had Severus' heart and he didn't. It was unacceptable.

When Severus started to break down again, Regulus simply held him, lending the comfort of his presence.

"Everything will be fine." Regulus whispered into Severus' ear. He meant it. He would be there to take care of Snape. "Are you not alone. I am here." He continued to whisper promises as Severus gradually calmed in his hold. "I will always be here."

It was then, he made the promise. A promise that he wouldn't keep. Though by no fault of his own.

* * *

Contrary to what most believed, Regulus did not join the Death Eaters because of the wishes of his parents. While he was mostly obedient, he could have stood up to his parents if he wanted to. No, he joined the Dark Lord because he wanted to protect Severus.

Regulus knew that there were no real winners in wars. He didn't care who won either. He only cared that he would keep what he treasured the most safe.

If he joined the Dark, he would be able to keep an eye on their activities. Should there ever be a threat to Severus, he would be able to protect the other man. It was a simple desire that drove him to do it.

Only then, he had found that the Dark Lord was more of a threat than he anticipated. Immortal…and evil. He feared what would happen if the Lord won the war. So he decided to stop the Dark Lord.

But things did not go as smoothly as he had hoped for. He knew the chance of succeeding was slim but he couldn't help but to try. He knew he shouldn't have drunk the potion but he refused to give up when he was so close to his goal.

Now, as the dark water closed around his head, he regretted not being able to keep his promise to Severus. He sank deeper into the lake, his air had run out a long time ago and water was filling up his lungs. He stared up at the waves above without blinking.

_Severus, I am sorry._

* * *

The park was full of activities as the children enjoy their freedom during summer. Some ran around chasing each other, some gathered together to play games. Amid all the chaos, there was a spot of calm. A black-haired child was sitting against a tall, slightly crooked tree, with his nose buried in a book. He paid no attention to any of the other activities going around him. That is until a soccer ball rolled to a stop by his feet.

"Hey! Could you pass the ball?" A voiced asked.

The boy looked up to see another boy his age with a head full of curly black hair. Wordlessly, he set down his book and grabbed his ball. Before he could throw it at the other boy, the boy had already walked up to him. Now he was squatting down in front of him. He passed ball to the other boy.

"Thanks!" The curly haired boy said. "What's your name?"

"Septimus Severus." The boy replied slowly. The other boy sat down beside Septimus and put the ball on the ground. He held out his hand.

"I am Regulus Noir. Nice to meet you, Septimus." Regulus said cheerfully.

Severus hesitantly shook Regulus' hand. They sat in silence for a while. Regulus had thrown his ball back to the group he was playing with but he did not leave. And Severus did not ask him to.

"You seem familiar. Have I met you before?" Regulu asked, finally breaking the silence. He looked at the other boy puzzedly.

Septimus tilted his head to the sky. "Maybe." Was all he said.

_Are you not alone. I am here. I will always be here._


	4. This World

**AN:** I guess this is a poem Severus wrote for Regulus.

* * *

In this world divided by Light and Dark,

Where should we go, us pawns on the chessboard of fate.

Just like prayers whispered in the darkest night.

Just like wingless eagles trying to take flight.

We fought, struggled and were eventually forgotten.

The two of us, wrapped mirrors of each other, are only ghosts.

†††◊◊†††◊◊†††

If I were to light the world with Fiendfyre,

Would you stay by my side amid the beastly flames?

If this world become a monster out for our blood,

Would you stand by my side until the end of time?

†††◊◊†††◊◊†††

In this world of illusions, miracles, and magic,

Where power come from brittle wands of wood.

I had hoped that this would be my escape,

Only to find that my dream had became my nightmare.

This secret world filled with prejudice, bigot, and lies.

It seemed that we are only human after all.

†††◊◊†††◊◊†††

Let's take a walk along the Black lake and pretend,

That we live in a world that sweet and crystal clear.

Let's dance among the ashes of yestereve,

And hope that tomorrow will be a better day.

†††◊◊†††◊◊†††

In this world ruled by blood of the old,

Where can I stand, halfling of both worlds.

You who tried so hard to become an ideal,

And I who sought to make a place for myself.

Maybe we have already lost sight of ourselves,

Before we even began to learn at all.

†††◊◊†††◊◊†††

If I were to embrace you in my impure blood,

Would you hold me tight to your chest?

If I asked you to find me when I lost myself,

Would you tell me who I am, among the crowd of humanity?

†††◊◊†††◊◊†††

In this world, death comes on silent wings,

Where magic breathed and pulsed.

What are we planning to achieve?

Our bloody feet treading along the worn path of life.

The whispers war brewing much too close to home.

What would you choose, if you ever had a choice.

†††◊◊†††◊◊†††

Let us pull a blindfold over our closed eyes,

To become blind to the blood bath that was sure to come.

Let us put our trembling hands over our ears,

To become deaf to the pleads and screams of the world.

†††◊◊†††◊◊†††

In this world of turmoil and unrest,

Where blood spills on the hallowed ground now.

Let me hide in the darkest dungeons,

And lose myself in cauldrons and potions.

But some things were never meant to be.

Our dreams were lost in the monster of war.

†††◊◊†††◊◊†††

If I shed the shell of my body and fade away,

Would you capture my ghostly hands and hold me back?

If I want to reach for the everlasting sky,

Would you be my wings to soar the air?

†††◊◊†††◊◊†††

In this world of fantasy becoming reality,

Where is the line between dreams and awakening?

This is a fairy tale made of love's potion.

If this love was a product of dark magic,

I will happily fall under the spell of temptation.

But these dreams of happiness would disappear in a blink of an eye.


End file.
